183. My Retirement Drag Path

183. My Retirement Drag Path. 

 

If you have been around me for any length of time or reading any of my past social media posts, I started a countdown to our retirement about a year ago. Every time I made a post I started with a number. With each successive post, that number would count down to our actual date of retirement.  

The purpose wasn’t to brag about “not much time till laziness’ or to have the idea of “boy I can’t wait to get out of here”. Rather, it was a reminder to me personally to reflect with a heart of gratitude of what has been and to look ahead of what is to become. 

About three months before we retired, a song by Twenty Pilots kept coming up in my algorithms. The song is called “Drag Path”. You may of heard of it, if not, just look up the American Music Awards 2026 show and you will see a beautiful portrayal of this song.  

The song lands differently with different people. God has always used music as a big way to get to the essence of my inner being, struggles, doubts and eventually to my giant leap into a life of faith.  

This song deals with the devil – aka hard times, depression, self-doubt, low esteem and actual spiritual warfare in our heart. The “evidence I left” refers to our individual journey. Our struggles, efforts of both success and failure, literal proof of where we have been, the life we have lived, and the scars that exist because of that journey. God has been there and, in many cases, sent people aka his angels, to help get me to the place I am today. 

I have looked back on the drag path of my life and though at times there were some deeply painful experiences and moments, my heart is overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude. For the people i have met, the opportunities afforded to me; my beautiful children and what has become of their lives; the faithfulness of my brilliant wife and evidence of things we had a hand in establishing together, built, wrote, taught or guided, still continue to this day. 

I decided to write a reflection on what my particular life has been like in the past three months on my new journey into retirement. Its day 183. Here is a brief summation: 

I am averaging now 7.5 hours of sleep a night. That is up 1.5 hours. 

Our home is truly our sanctuary. Its hard for me to even think of traveling anywhere because of the peace we feel here, and the provision of beautiful space is overwhelming. 

My confidence has soared: I was hired instantly for a people time part-time job collecting tickets at the county fair; I began auditioning for plays again and landed a fun and meaningful role after the second audition; I have auditioned another time already and have a film audition coming up for a speaking role. My dream has always been get back to my acting roots and its coming alive for me in retirement. 

My spiritual life feels richer. I have more time for reflection, pausing, and embracing silence. 

My DIY skills are improving: i have fixed our sprinkler system in numerous places; I have hung up racks in the garage; I have prepared the lawn for winter; I am working on repairing the fence and painting it; the crack in the garage floor is bugging me to the point of research and finding the right thing to fix it; and I am preparing to blow out the sprinkler system for winter. (we just have a few warm days ahead before I do that) 

I am saying no. And not feeling guilty in the least about it. No to getting too involved in things right away. No to doing what I have always done in the past and finding new things to do that are enriching to me. 

I am not sitting around having a pity party because no one is calling for my sage advice or wants me to speak here, teach at this, be in that. In fact if I was completely honest about it, I think if they call right now I probably wouldn’t answer. But, I am not that rude so call if you want.:😀

I am enjoying the silence. No emails, no complaints, no employee issues, no money problems, no work-related stress, no deadlines, almost zero contact from most previous colleagues or associates. Those who do contact are truly the ones I consider my friends in this new part of my life. 

I am intentionally making new friends. I talk to strangers more. I smile at people. I look at them in the eyes. I ask questions. “Tell me what life is like here, where is the best places to go, etc.” Some of those folks will be my new friends for a long time now. I am a walking “don’t become your parents” Progressive insurance commercial.  

We are exploring. We say hey today let's go here but if all sudden we don’t feel like it, we don’t. 

I am living the premise of my book, “Rest for the rest of us” to its daily fullest. 

So what lazy retired man, so what? Well, here’s the so what: 

My retirement road map is laid out before me. There are opportunities ahead for Cindy and I. Detours will come up. I look back at the drag path I have left and smile. The evidence is there. My time is limited as is in reality all of our time. So, I scroll past the yelling, try to rise above the negativity, and set a new course into the future with joy and expectation. 

On day 184, lets see here...oh, I have to put the trash can out. Not much else is on the agenda for the day yet. Keep smiling. 

 

" Better to keep your mouth closed..." P2P

 Better to keep your mouth closed...

As I am memorizing lines for the Dad character I play in "Leaving Iowa", one of my favorite lines is this: "Hannibal is home to one of our greatest literary hero's - Mark Twain."

Now Dad has a lot more funny, memorable and catchy lines than that, but in context of the background of this character, he has got me thinking more about Mark Twain. I ran across a quote of his that got me really thinking about our current days:

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt." Mark Twain

Now I admit I have said my fair share of stupid things in life but I am seeing and hearing more of erratic, hate filled, vitorial comments from people, well, it just surprises me. Lots of this stuff pops up on my social media feeds that I didn't ask for. I guess my algorithm says I like to listen to fools. Most of this content is from people I don't know but it really becomes a mental quagmire when it comes from people I know and even love.

Here is a few things about me you may not know:

    

    I never read Yelp reviews any more (9 times out of ten its going to be negative). I don't care if you had a bad experience or your food was cold. Let me find out on my own.

    Someone that goes on a political rant usually gets a 30 day unfollow. If it doesn't stop its gets an unfriend or a block.

    I am not interested in your surgery pictures. I am glad you made it thru, honeslty I am, Sorry, but open wounds healing - save that for the medical journals.

    Endless sports team debates. I get it. You won and are proud and loud. You lost and are silent and absent.

What I am attracted to today is kindness. People who are appreciating life. We always have things that divide us. Two things that I have seen divide people in my time on earth and in my study of history is politics and religion. As a credentialed theologian, I am constantly reminded of the words of the Preacher: "there is nothing new under the sun."

In the beginning stages of my retired life I have decided to live my best life the way I want to live it. I don't want to live in the seat of judgement or the sphere of negativity. That might be naive in some peoples way of thinking, but, so what? I will keep my opinions to myself and if asked, I would carefully think out what I should say. I will keep Mark Twain's advice close to my heart.

When you are faced with the fact you have crossed the apex in life where you begin to see less sunsets, perspective changes. What's important comes into view. Arguing political points, who is the greatest quarterback every, and gloom and doom predications, don't bother me with that. I quickly move on.

I would rather be naming the birds who take sancturary in my backyard; talking to my squirrel couple - Larry & Lori - and reminding my friends and family that I love them. While I still have breath.

As someone once said: "If you don't have something nice to say, then don't say it."

Keeping my mouth shut and my fingers off the key board is truly in my best interest, and the interest of others.

Tim Foley

September 11, 2026

Parson to Person. - First September

 This is the first September that Cindy and I will be experiencing in our new home and in our new way of life. For the past four decades, this month always marked the time of transition. You move from the slow pace of the summer into a rapid acceleration of ramping up programs, holiday planning and attending lots of various events. A free Saturday on the calendar was almost nonexistent.

The past five years meant an increase in our road travel throughout the northwest to visit the various institutions and operations that we had oversight for. There were a lot of hours spent driving on the road and endless hotel stays. There were plane trips to Los Angeles for special events and meetings. There were Christmas kickoff events to attend starting late September that reached well into November.

Cindy always made those journey's special with her exploration of scouting out and seeing some of the unique places that were peppered along the path of our travels. One look at her Facebook posts will give you an indication of some of the beautiful sights we were witness to.

At the time of this writing, we are in the Labor Day weekend. For the US this is typically the end of summer and the start up of back to school time. Which in our area all the schools have already been back in session. It's one final rest before the big push happens for businesses and families alike. The holiday season looms large on the horizon.

This year it feels much different of course as we descend into the month. Labor Day is just another Monday. All days feel like Saturday when you are retired. We have a few markers on the calendar. I have several rehearsal dates reserved for the play I am in. At any time I can take on one of these "gig jobs" have . A few other appointments to get to, but the pressure is off. I won't lie but it feels great!

It is not a matter of "do you miss it?" or are you "relieved?" Rather its just what it is. More time now in the morning to enjoy a cup of coffee, prayer and plotting out some puttering activities for the day. Maybe sleeping a bit longer or taking a nap when I feel like it. Consuming more football on tv than humanly possible. But its also a time for us to reach out intentionally to spend a bit more time with family and friends.

Take notice of what season of life you are in. Acknowledge it. Embrace it. Enjoy it. In all honesty it will zoom by before you know it. If you pause along the way, you won't regret it.

"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

September 5, 2026

copyright -Tim Foley 

Time for a dust off

 Let's get this going.

My wife gave me the suggestion a few days ago that it was time for me to start writing again. Now that we are fully engaged in retirement from our previous profession of some 44 years, its time to begin recording new thoughts, ideas and moments of inspiration.

I used to write a weekly column for the Sunday bulletins of the four churches we pastored. It was called "Parson to Person."  In case you have never heard of the phrase before here is a simple definition:  the term is old-fashioned, informal, or sometimes humorous, and can refer broadly to any Protestant minister or local pastor

Usually in less than 100 words I would write observations of my week with a spiritual connection. Sometimes it would be a thing that happened to our family or myself. It could be in conjunction with a new item or some world event. At times it was tied to the sermon I would be preaching that day. Tag on a scripture application, I probably have well over 250 of these written. But I have never put them in any organized manner.

You have to remember that I started my ministry work before personal computers. Word processors were just coming on to the scene and were very expensive and beyond my budget. But I  happen to have most of these writings in hard copy form today. I write my sermons in narrative form and collect them. I have a simple paper filing system that was given to me some 40 years ago. I am going to go thru these past writings, edit them and bring them to life within this blog. 

I thought about what Cindy said and I am going to give it a go. I have enjoyed writing over the years. I have written a book "Rest - for the rest of us".  You can find it on Kindle. I have have several published articles and was a contributing columnist to the Salvation Army's US national magazine - the War Cry. I eventually went on to be the editor of that magazine for two years from 2019 to 2021.  I am horrible grammar and often use a lot of redundancy in my raw writings. Fortunately I married an actual editor. And my oldest daughter is an English major with excellent written skills. They are my go to for proof reading and correction. 

I have a lot of thoughts bouncing around in my head even today on all sorts of topics. From DIY ideas, model trains, nature, theater, gaming as well as what is going on in the church today. I have given some thought about writing a play and even begin writing my own stand up clean comedy material and try it out at local open mics. 

I now can write freely. These words would be my words. Not associated with my church affiliation. It comes with my own bias and world view.

I was hoping in retirement to stay connected more closely with the inner theological circles of my denomination. That door closed on me July 1. I was looking forward to writing on a national book project as well. That door shut hard as well. So now, I am a freelance writer, not looking for monetary gain but I know I need a focused, creative writing outlet that I control.

I am keeping all of my previous written content uploaded here in place. You will see some gap years in the archives. Hopefully you can find some inspiration there.

So its time for a dust off. Blowing the cobwebs out and getting the words flowing again. Hopefully on a more regular basis. 

Enjoy

Best

T

copyright 9-2-26  Tim Foley